I’ve been talking to this guy who I met online and he seems like a really lovely guy, but the only issue is that I don’t feel like it’s going anywhere nor do I know his intentions. We’ve been texting for 2 months, we’ve only spoken on the phone once at the beginning and he’s never asked to meet me (he once joked about meeting at the start). When I said that I feel like he wasn’t interested in me, he questioned me and said it’s because he’s been really busy with a new job and gym taking up most much of his time. He said he’ll make more effort but never actually gave me reassurance and then carried on like nothing happened. I don’t want to end things with him but I do feel like he’s wasting my time and also making me feel needy when I try and progress things further. What should I say to him and do in this situation?
*Name changed for anonymity
I know it might feel like there is so much worth pursuing here but you’ve highlighted a lot of red flags. The biggest for me, being that you’re already at the point where you’re beginning to feel needy and that’s never a good thing.
It’s been 2 months and he’s not seriously suggested meeting up – I’d be question whether he actually has any intention of progressing this situation.
Right now, it sounds like this man has found a great way to pass his time and while doing so, is keeping you at an arms length, so things don’t get too serious. Now I’m assuming this isn’t a long distance situation. Regardless, know that If a man is serious about you, then he’ll carve out some time to see you (even if Its a few weeks etc down the line due to a busy schedule).
So at this point, If this were me, I’d be quite clear about what I’m looking for and ask how he feels/whether he is looking for the same thing. If he doesn’t give you a clear answer and still leaves you hanging – I think you have your answer.
All my duas,
Disclaimer: I am not a licensed relationship expert/coach. Advice and responses are solely based off my own experiences and opinions. Please use your own judgement and seek professional help where needed.
If you are searching for Islamic guidance, this is not the place. Please contact an imam/ respected scholar etc who can can guide you appropriately inshAllah.